Well, this morning I decided to “surprise” someone ( and as it turns out, myself in the process ) by attempting to produce the appearance of an all-out girlie for the first time in god alone knows how long!
Time, competance, and as it is turning out, sheer lack of useable warpaint is currently weighing heavily against a positive result!
Morning coffee… successfully achieved
Shower…. bloody freezing
School-run…. lunch made and packed, books in bag, everything by the door, achieved
Painting toe nails…. well, they DID look kinda fab for a brief instant, I remembered reading somewhere that less is definately more when applying, so resisted the temptation to go over each nail more than the once, actually didn’t get varnish on the sides of the toes, like I usually do…then decided my feet were cold and put fluffy slippers on without thinking…..
I wonder if cute furry-edged toe nails might now become a “thing” ???
Next I tried to drag a brush through still-wet ( and heavily un-conditioned as I discovered I had run out!) hair…. result… mad knotted mass of straw…ok so maybe a hat might be a good plan for later, somehow I suspect the Worzel Gummidge look isn’t quite going to have the desired effect!
On to face, make-up and eyes….spending longer trying to sharpen an eyeliner pencil than actually applying make-up at present, four old stubs later and none will sharpen, it appears they’ve broken inside. Attempting to draw a reasonably straight line on eyes armed with a broken piece of liner pencil held with a pair of tweezers is NOT to be recommended, the red-eye weeping look is, as with the hair, NOT going to produce the desired effect either!
Half an hour of trying to draw lines, conceal other lines, smudge, re-apply and curse my way through the war paint exercise, I THOUGHT I’d managed an overall look of reasonably chic if slightly overdone middle-aged ready to go out on the town effect.
Go to wake son up to get ready for school…… ok, so maybe he’d just had a bad dream before he opened his eyes, but the look of sheer terror on his face will haunt me for a while.
His first words, once he’d fully awakened were “ooh mum is it Halloween today?”
Ok, so it’s going to be a case of wobbling up to the village shop on never-before worn heels and placing a wanted card in the window… Werewolfess seeking suitably blind mate
The school run is going to be interesting!
Sow’s ear Wurzel Gummidge Clown look…. achieved!